As the end of the year approaches, questions about plans become particularly relevant. We compare expectations with reality, ponder the future, and often believe that written goals will help us realize them.
From the perspective of gestalt therapy, the important aspect is not the mere fact of setting goals but the state from which a person approaches this task.
Planning can serve as a means of connecting with oneself or, conversely, become a substitute for that connection.Contact with oneself in gestalt therapy implies awareness of one's feelings and needs in the present moment. Simply put, it is important to understand how sincere the goals for the upcoming year are and whether they stem from internal desires rather than being imposed from the outside.
For example, if someone sets a goal to learn a foreign language within a year, they should figure out why this is necessary. It may be an expectation from others, or it could be a genuine interest in the language and a desire to communicate in it. Sometimes, a person struggles to relax and constantly feels guilty for not using their free time productively, which leads them to enroll in language courses, turning language learning into a burden rather than a pleasure. It is crucial to realize what meanings are embedded in the goals and how well they align with personal desires.
Gestalt therapy also emphasizes individual rhythm. Some find it easier to act according to a clear plan, while others prefer to act based on their current feelings and make decisions on the go. Both approaches can be beneficial if they help maintain a connection with oneself. To avoid losing this contact, it is worth asking oneself questions: what is important now, what do I need, what rhythm suits me, and is this truly my desire, not someone else's expectation? This approach reduces pressure and allows for more realistic and self-caring planning for the next year.
Plans themselves are neither good nor bad. It all depends on the purpose for which they are made and the state in which they are created.When a person is aware of their true needs, plans become not a burden but a natural continuation of their desires. For instance, the desire to learn a foreign language may be linked to the wish to expand professional horizons or to communicate freely while traveling. In such cases, goals indicate direction, while plans help allocate efforts. If something does not work out or requires adjustment, it is perceived as part of the process rather than a failure, as the goals were formed from desire rather than obligation.
What to remember when planning:
- Plans are more effective when based on personal desires rather than the expectations of others.
- Goals can set direction, but the plans themselves should be flexible and revisable.
- If plans cause anxiety or guilt, it may be more important to focus on restoring energy and self-care at this time.
- Unfulfilled goals may indicate that they were not relevant or too challenging.
- Some people find it easier to work with clear structures and lists, while others value the ability to change their decisions based on their mood.
- Sometimes it is more beneficial not to set goals but to recognize what is important now and what one has the energy for.
