As the New Year approaches, many people, surrounded by festive lights and a joyful atmosphere, face winter blues and deep sadness. This condition, known as "Grinch syndrome," is quite normal and widespread.
Psychologist and psychiatrist from the Republican Center for Psychiatry and Narcology, Aliya Ashchi, in an interview with 24.kg, explained why in December we often feel tired and how social media and toxic relatives exacerbate feelings of guilt, as well as why simply making it to the end of the year can be the best outcome.
— Why does December evoke feelings of fatigue and apathy in many people? Is it related to biology or social pressure?
— Both biological and social factors play a role. The decrease in sunlight, cold weather, and reduced consumption of fresh vegetables and fruits rich in vitamins lead to a drop in serotonin levels. This, in turn, causes fatigue, lack of energy, and apathy, prompting the body to switch to "energy-saving mode."
Celebrating the New Year symbolizes the summation of results and the completion of cycles: we assess our achievements and make reports. Social expectations also play a role: "How you meet the New Year is how you will spend it." This creates pressure: one must be joyful, give gifts, prepare treats, and host guests. As a result, this pressure leads to even greater apathy and feelings of guilt.
— Why do people especially compare themselves to others and their own plans at the end of the year?
— The New Year is perceived as a moment of reckoning: "What have I achieved this year?" The brain, striving to find meaning, automatically begins to compare itself with others, which is an evolutionary survival mechanism. At the end of the year, this feeling becomes particularly acute as we see the successes of others on social media, their gifts, and trips. At the beginning of the year, we set ambitious goals, but by the end, we often face a reality that differs from our expectations, leading to stress and self-criticism.
Social media and traditional holidays prompt us to reflect on the past year. Posts about others' achievements intensify the feeling of comparison.
Aliya Ashchi, psychologist
— How do social media affect our state of mind?
— On social media, we only see successes. "Year in review" posts represent idealized moments: successful trips, achievements, and happy relationships. In reality, most people's lives consist of routine and difficulties that are not showcased. By comparing their reality to edited versions of others' lives, people begin to feel worse, which exacerbates the blues. It is important to remember that social media often distorts reality; everyone has their ups and downs, and that is normal.
— How can you tell if it’s just pre-New Year blues and not depression?
— Pre-New Year blues manifest closer to the holidays and usually pass after a break. Even if a person feels tired and irritable, they can still enjoy themselves and carry out daily tasks. Mood may fluctuate depending on external circumstances.
Depression is a serious mental disorder that requires professional intervention. It manifests as a persistent low mood lasting at least two weeks.
Additionally, a person may develop:
- anhedonia — lack of joy;
- anergia — complete lack of energy;
- thoughts of suicide or attempts in severe cases.
Depression does not go away on its own. There is no need to be afraid to seek support from loved ones, and if symptoms appear, from a specialist: it is important not to be alone with the problem.
— Why do some people feel an increased sense of loneliness in December, even if they are not alone?
— Society broadcasts ideals of "family holidays," warm evening gatherings, and large companies. When real relationships do not meet these standards, a dissonance arises between expectations and reality. Even when in relationships or surrounded by friends, people may feel lonely if the emotional connection has weakened or if there is a lot of stress in life.
The holiday hustle can cause irritation even among close ones, which increases tension and adds to feelings of guilt.
Aliya Ashchi, psychologist
— How to cope with "Grinch syndrome" when the New Year only brings apathy?
— "Grinch syndrome" is not a medical diagnosis but rather a colloquial term for a state when the joy of the holiday disappears. This may be related to fatigue, emotional burnout, or negative memories of past holidays. Allow yourself not to feel joy on a schedule.
If you feel exhausted, do not force yourself to "be happy." Reduce the pressure from the environment, choose a calmer format for the holiday, or decrease the number of events.
— How do family gatherings and relatives' expectations affect emotional well-being? How can you protect yourself?
— Family gatherings often cause stress, especially when a person faces intrusive questions about their personal life, career, or plans. Such questions can touch on sensitive topics and provoke tension and irritation.
Most often, relatives do not intend to offend you; they simply do not recognize boundaries, although some can indeed be toxic.
Aliya Ashchi, psychologist
— How to act in such situations?
— Prepare neutral responses in advance: "I don’t know," "We’ll see," "At the right moment." This will help you feel in control and reduce tension. Respond calmly, but clearly indicate that the questions are uncomfortable for you. Remember that you are not obligated to meet others' expectations. If you feel lacking in something, it does not make you worse than others. Try to stay close to comfortable people and avoid toxic relatives.
— What would you advise those who feel empty at the end of the year?
— Allow yourself to rest, do not strive to do everything, do not force yourself to have fun, and accept your shortcomings. It is also important to pay attention to basic needs — sleep, nutrition, and personal life. If the feeling of emptiness does not leave you for a long time and affects your daily life, seek support.
Sometimes the best outcome of the year can simply be its completion.
Aliya Ashchi, psychologist
— How to create healthy year-end rituals to reduce stress?
— Determine what you need: active or passive rest. Make rituals achievable; for example, instead of "read 300 pages," choose "spend an evening with a book." The simpler, the better. Reward yourself for completed tasks and add an element of closure, such as writing letters to yourself or making real plans.
Physical activity, such as dancing or walking, can help strengthen your body and mood. Find time for solitude without gadgets and external pressure. Do not force yourself to do things you do not have the energy for.
Even those who love the festive atmosphere can experience an emotional downturn at the end of the year. December is a month of high expectations and pressures. The paradox is that the desire to do everything perfectly leads to emotional exhaustion. Therefore, even holiday lovers may find it difficult. Allow yourself to rest.
The feeling that you are not accomplishing anything is not an objective indicator of your productivity.
Aliya Ashchi, psychologist
To cope with tension:
- break down real tasks that cannot be postponed;
- reduce the number of planned events;
- do not compare yourself to others, especially on social media;
- include time for rest in your schedule;
- remember that the New Year is just as ordinary a day as any other.
Where to find help:
If you suspect a deterioration in your mental state or notice signs of a disorder, contact specialists at the Republican Center for Psychiatry and Narcology at the following numbers:
- +9960312542219 — reception;
- +9960312570962 — psychiatry post;
- +9960312574774 — duty office (psychiatry).
